How To Travel To Oktoberfest 2023
Getting to Munich’s Oktoberfest can be quite the ordeal, with all of the world’s beer lovers pining for a mega-pint of that delicious Bavarian nectar. But never fear, not only…
ANGEL RAMSEY
The loosest European festival of the year is finally here! And because we know you’re forgetful dirtbags, we’ve whipped up this list of Oktoberfest essentials, so you rock up to Munich ready to fest with the best of them.
Here at Stoke we love to party and the number one party essential is your most obnoxious party shirt. Think loud colors and patterns, the more flamboyant the better. When you look snazzy, you feel snazzy and snazzy is the key to a good time.
Probably the most underrated tool in the toolbox, glitter never fails to amp up the party. Whether paired with that flashy party shirt or jazzing up your lederhosen, glitter is your best friend. You won’t want to be the only fool with plain boring non-sparkling skin.
Probably the most practical item on this list, but definitely worth noting are gum boots. Sometimes it rains. Stay dry and keep the party going with some solid rain boots and you’ll be sweet.
The Stoketoberfest campsite has plenty of awesome features, but its best one is arguably the chicken nugget vending machine. For five euros you can get a bowl of freshly made chicken nuggets that some claim are even better than Mcdonald’s. But the most fun part is that the amount of nugs you receive are totally random — you can get anywhere from 1 to 25. We include a hearty, cooked breakfast and a knockout dinner, but these little treats are perfect after a bender, before a bender, on the way to the beer halls. Really they’re a godsend, so keep that cash handy.
This one’s for the ladies and is a crucial dirndl accessory. Accentuating the cleavage is the dirndl’s best feature, so give it a little umph with a good bra.
Munich is fucking cold. Booze and warm clothes have their limitations. Bring a snuggle buddy to keep the midnight chills away. But don’t worry if you can’t check this one off the list, beer halls and campsites are prime pickings for warm bodies.
Speaking of snuggle buddies, bring protection! No one wants STIs or Okiefest babies. Be smart and make sure you’ve got those condoms in the bag.
There you have it, the only things you’ll need to conquer Oktoberfest like a true legend. Now get your shit together and get over here to Stoketoberfest to take the party to the next level. We’re almost fully booked! But there may still be some midweek spots left if you hurry, heathens.