Contact Us

    Pamplona bull vows to float like butterfly, sting like bee


    Posted by Stoke Media Team
    4 years ago | October 16, 2018

    Pamplona bull vows to float like butterfly, sting like bee

    A Pamplona running bull has vowed to bring a bit of the old razzle dazzle to this year’s San Fermin festival.

    The young male, who has spent the majority of his life training for this one event, issued some chilling premonitions during a recent press conference.

    “I’m going to float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. Those runners’ feet can’t avoid what their eyes can’t see. My horns are like lightning, they’re going to come at you fast and hot, and they’re sharp like samurai swords and as nimble as a ninja – you won’t even know i’m slicing you up.

    “You’ve heard of the raging bull, but I’m not mad. I’m a cold, calculated runner-rolling machine. I’ve done all the training and now I’ve got you in my sights. There’s nothing you can do, your fate is set. I’m coming for you, i’ve always been coming for you, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. I’m stone cold. I’m a killer.”

    Despite the threats, the big talking bull insists that he bears his potential victims no ill will.

    “I don’t know anything about my upcoming victims, who they are, what they do, nothing. This isn’t about them. This isn’t personal. Heck, I even respect them. I think they’re good people. And I mean them no ill will. That said, I’m definitely going to make orphans of their children.”

    When pressed on whether the bull’s talk was all bluster, he was sure of his position in the pantheon of fighting bulls.

    “There’s no bull living or dead who’s as great as me. Those people should feel blessed to be gored by greatness. The horns of a god, coming inside you. I’m the best bull, the number one, the top hamburger. I’m the most beautiful, my rump is the juiciest, my ribs the tastiest. They call me Mr T Bone and I pity the fool who gets between this gorgeous bull and the finish line.

    “I’m the greatest!”

    The outburst has confirmed that running with the bulls is a really, really bad idea, but one that for some reason we’ll do anyway. A spokesperson for the bull runners told reporters that while participating in the tradition is obviously dangerous, most participants don’t even think about it.

    “To be honest I don’t know what they think is going to happen. These bulls are literally half-tonne steamrollers who have had their horns sharpened so they can inflict maximum damage on anyone with the misfortune to be in their way. Sure, this particular bull says some pretty scary things, but to be completely honest it’s the quieter bulls we should be worried about – you won’t even hear them coming and WHAMMO. I don’t know why anybody runs with the bulls.

    “But yeah, of course I’ll be running with the bulls this year, it’s so much fun!”

    Stoke Travel caters for the lunatics who want to run with bulls, and the legends who are just there for the party. Make sure you stay with Stoke to get the most out of San Fermin, as we make sure you’re always where the action is – even going to the effort of putting a music festival on in our campsite.

    Related Trips
    Bilbao BBK Live
    Pamplona’s San Fermin 2023
    Related Articles
    Five Reasons Why The Stoke App Will Make Travelling Europe Wonderful

    Maybe you’ve heard, perhaps you haven’t, but Stoke Travel has made an app! Rather than let the pandemic and dissolving of youth travel kill our momentum, we decided to use…

    Read More

    Which European festivals and events have been cancelled due to coronavirus? 

    An updating list of the music and cultural festivals, and sporting events, across Europe that have been cancelled, postponed, or rescheduled in 2020 due to COVID-19, and those that remain…

    Read More

    Stoke Travel Announces Bottomless Brunch At All Destinations

    Further cementing their status as the flyest playas in the game, Stoke Travel have upped the stakes by improving on their already amazing hot breakfasts, and offering travellers bottomless brunches…

    Read More

    Backpacking and Travelling Europe Solo

    There is no greater experience in this travelling life than taking a solo trip across Europe. Free from the restrictions of having travel buddies with different ideas, open to changing…

    Read More

    How to Catch the Bus to Pamplona

    You’ll probably be too focused on gathering your cajones to run with the bulls or daydreaming about insane street fiestas to think about the logistics of getting to Pamplona, so…

    Read More

    What to Pack for a European Summer with Stoke

    Your European summer has finally arrived.  Like the absolute sesh savage you are, you’ve booked a few of Stoke’s epic summer packages.  Your suitcase is already stuffed with your cheekiest…

    Read More

    Running With Bulls Drunk And/Or On Drugs

    No, we’re not talking about the bulls themselves being drunk and/or on drugs, although anybody who has ever attended a party where overly testosteroned guys are getting wasted will attest…

    Read More

    Stoke Travel Trips For Solo Travellers

      You’re never alone when you’re a Stokie Travel alone they said. It’s the only way to really explore and grow and get to know the place you’re visiting and…

    Read More

    Big Stupid Idiot Doesn’t Book With Stoke Travel For Running Of The Bulls

    Don’t want to make the same mistake as Jeff? Click here to book your Bulls trip now (and get your third night free) Travelling cretin, Jeff Thompson, 25, has confirmed…

    Read More

    We’re Not The Closest Campsite To Pamplona

      Which is just as well, because that campsite sucks compared to ours! In the course of your Running of the Bulls research you may have noticed that we’re not…

    Read More

    Running With Bulls FAQs

    There’s so much to know about Pamplona’s San Fermin festival and its famous bull run, so we compiled this little list of running with bulls FAQs. If you have more…

    Read More

    Pamplona 2019: less bulls, more babes

    We’re going to focus on the finer San Fermin things, like partying all night long There’s no denying that the running of the bulls is a fiesta that courts controversy, and…

    Read More

    Search Stoke Travel Search by Trip, Destination, Month...